What Am I Doing Here?
What am I doing here all alone?
Could someone whisper in my ear my how you’ve grown
No moon, no stars, no Venus, no Mars
No sun, no sky, no welcome, no goodbye
No shadow, no light, no wrong, no right
No time, no space, no sin, no grace
What am I doing here all alone?
Could someone whisper in my ear my how you have grown
There's not much time, in fact there's none
No words to say for what I've done
No pride, no shame, no praise, no blame
No hunger, no thirst, no blessing, no curse
No blade, no rope, no despair, no hope
No hatred, no love, below or above
What am I doing here?
No moon, no stars, no Venus, no Mars
No sun, no sky, no welcome, no goodbye
No shadow, no light, no wrong, no right
No time, no space, no sin, no grace
What am I doing here? What am I doing here?
What am I doing here all alone?
Could someone whisper in my ear my how you’ve grown
Welcome home, welcome home, welcome home, welcome home…
Beautiful
How beautiful is a flower in bloom
Beautiful in its delicate doom
Beautiful in such fragile grace
That eternity longs for a taste
How beautiful is a baby's first breath
Beautiful birth, beautiful death
Beautiful, such an innocent face
That eternity longs for a taste
Behind the darkest of defeats, a clear, quiet heart beats
And the reaper’s hand makes the grain more precious...
How beautiful is a lover's first kiss
Beautiful in its sweet aching bliss
So beautiful, such a fleeting embrace
That eternity longs for a taste
How beautiful are the stars in the skies
May be gone before the light ever reaches our eyes
Such a shimmering swan song in the dark night of space
That eternity longs for a taste
Behind the darkest of defeats, a clear quiet heart beats
And the reaper’s hand makes the grain more precious...
How beautiful is a soul on the cross
Beautiful in the love and the loss
The moment a heart breaks, such a moment of grace
That eternity longs for a taste
Of our streak through the heavens leaving only a trace
Eternity longs for a taste
And the reaper’s hand makes the grain more precious....
Can We Hold It All?
Her eyes caress his tiny form, it’s so hard to believe
How one so young, so beautiful, so soon has to leave
A voice speaks from the dark and broken emptiness inside
Can you make space for grief and grace in your heart and mind?
Chorus:
Can we hold it all, the terror and the bliss?
Can we feel the devil’s dance and the angel’s kiss?
We’re bound for heaven’s glory, we’re bound to fail and fall
Can we hold it all? Can we hold it all?
He can barely breathe, there are tears within his smile
His daughter’s hand holds tight to him as they walk down the aisle
His arm will soon be empty, and in the void that’s left behind
There bursts a bittersweet release of joy and pain and pride
[Chorus]
You fill me like a chalice, you pierce me like a spear
You spill me back into the stars until I disappear
You heal me with your fire and burn me with your ice
You hold me as the flames of hell become a paradise
[Chorus]
All I’ve Ever Wanted
All I’ve ever wanted is to feel your hand in mine
All I’ve ever wanted is to drink your holy wine
All I’ve ever really wanted is to sail into your sky so blue
All I’ve ever really wanted is you
All I’ve ever wanted is your breath within my chest
All I’ve ever wanted is your heart in which to rest
All I’ve ever really wanted is your fragrance in the morning dew
All I’ve ever really wanted is you
Chorus:
You’re all I’ve ever wanted and all I’ll ever need
Though I’m haunted by my hunger, gripped by my greed
And I’ll forget a million times before my life is through
That all I’ve ever really wanted is you
All I’ve ever wanted is to sense you with my skin
All I’ve ever wanted is to hold you deep within
All I’ve ever really wanted is to see your sunlight shining through
All I’ve ever really wanted is you
All I’ve ever wanted is to taste you on my tongue
All I’ve ever wanted is to hear your song unsung
All I’ve ever really wanted is to know that it is true
That all I’ve ever really wanted is you
[Chorus] All I’ve ever really wanted is you
I Can Let You Go
I can let you go, I can let you stay
Can cry to the sky, tears can clear the clouds away
I can be confused or I can simply know
That I can let you come, and I can let you go
You who’ve melted in the mist, are you dancing, are you lost?
Never has it hurt like this and never could I count the cost
I can let you go, I can let you come
Hold you close against my soul, let you turn away and run
I can let my heart feel all there is to feel
I can let it hurt, and I can let it heal
After all is felt and blessed, after all is said and done
I’ll look for you between my breaths, let silence spill back toward the One
I can let you go, I can let you stay
Can cry to the sky, tears can clear the clouds away
I can be confused or I can simply know
That I can let you come, and I can let you go
You Are Here
I’ve heard the hallelujahs in the rushing running water
I’ve heard my mother weeping in the night
I’ve seen the sins of fathers living in their daughters
And I’ve seen the sacred dance of geese in flight
Though our land is cloaked in darkness I can feel You in the night
And wake from dreams into the mystery
How can the One who loves us be so hidden from our sight
Yet visible to hearts that long to see?
You are here all around, even in our darkness
In each sight, in every sound, You are here
I’ve felt the blade of sorrow as it cuts into my heart
And in that wound I’ve welcomed healing peace
I’ve tasted bitterness in my hunger for revenge
And I’ve savored sweet forgiveness and release
And though I know the dawn is coming and I see signs in the sky
I keep a candle burning through the night
In the darkness lives a beauty that is hidden from the eye
And shines on us a secret of the light
You are here all around, even in our darkness
In each sight, in every sound, you are here
You are here. You are here. You are here.
Love is a Promise
Love grows in fits, love grows in starts, it heals our hurts and breaks our hearts
Love lifts us up and brings us down, but one thing’s for sure as we hit the ground
There are times in our lives when we’re left high and dry
We hunger and thirst and we reach for the sky
But the water is rising and the river runs deep
Love is a promise we keep, love is a promise we keep
Love is like crystal both fragile and strong, a nightingale in the midst of her song
When the chalice shatters and the song’s at an end, what is buried in the earth rises again
Let it rise when our spirits are broken, when the pain is so great that we can’t feel at all
We are held in the arms of love even as we fall, every time we fall.
Rising above, falling below we are loved more than we ever will know
As we cover our eyes and pretend we’re not here, love is a promise unbroken by fear
Through the times we’ve given in, when our faith’s given out
When the poisoned pond tempts us in the dead of a drought
Know the water is rising and the river runs deep
And love is a promise we keep
And miles to go before we sleep,
Love is a promise we keep, love is a promise we keep
Without You
Your teachers can’t teach you, your leaders can’t lead you
Your lover can’t love you without you
Your helpers can’t help you, your healers can’t heal you
Your savior can’t save you without you
Chorus:
Without you, though you know it’s not all about you
Within you, breathes the Spirit you need to begin to heal
And the One who’s within you can’t do it without you
Without you, within you, the veil is so thin,
You know heaven is here all about you
Though heartbreak is hell somehow all will be well
As you move through the pain and the doubt
You hold within you like a child with her fist to the wind
You know you can heal all the sin you feel lives within and without you
Got your finger on the trigger of something much bigger
Than the one you believe will stick it to you
Though you try to defend such an unholy end
It’s still a gory, glory hallelujah
No doubt you know life will still go on without you
Still within you, breathes the Spirit you need to begin to heal
And the one who’s within you can’t do it without you
The One who’s within you can’t do it without you
Heal My Heart (by Linda Worster)
Jesus my brother, come heal my heart,
There’s a piece missing, it’s falling apart
And my life’s leaking out through the hole left behind
Leaving me empty helpless and blind
While I am empty, Lord, fill me
While I am blind, teach me to see
While I am helpless, come take my part
Jesus my brother, heal my heart
There’s a sea of emotion, I’m caught in a storm
Churning with feelings all tangled and torn
My love built a ship; it was swept off and lost
Now it lies broken, twisted and tossed
O I am an ocean Lord, walk upon me
Calm the waves of this pounding sea
And as the sun rises, we’ll be right at the start
Jesus my brother, heal my heart
Jesus, my brother, come to me now
This wound needs to close Lord, but I don’t know how
My bandages fail me; they’re only pretend
Illusions are torn before feelings can mend
Breathe on me Jesus; I know You can heal it
If pain is my teacher, I’m ready to feel it
And make of my pieces a work of Your art,
Jesus my brother, heal my heart
You Rise Again
Like the sun after a midnight storm
Like a wise old soul who’s been reborn
Like a phoenix rising from her flames
You rise again
Like a flower unfolding in the sun
Like a reprise when you thought the song was done
Like a mother bear from out her darkened den
You rise again
You rise again, with a softness in your soul
You rise again, even as the death bell tolls
You rise again, no matter what or when
You rise again, you rise again
Like the spring that breaks old winter’s grip
Like Jesus at the soldier’s whip
And like the One who brings death to an end
You rise again
You rise again, with a softness in your soul
You rise again, even as the death bell tolls
You rise again, no matter what or when
You rise again though it’s hard to comprehend
Even as the darkness threatens to descend
When hopelessness seems like your only friend
You rise again…
Jump Into Fire
All I can do and all I can say
Is I never wanted to get in your way
Now I’m living here in the lesson I have learned
If you jump into fire, you’re gonna burn
You know it is humbling and you know it is hard
The heart is yet softened as it is scarred
And you're living your life in the lesson you have learned
If you jump into fire, you’re gonna burn, you’re gonna burn
You know I can't stop, you know I can't go
I’m a slave to the light in the fire's warm glow
And we’re living our lives in the lessons we have learned
If we jump into fire, we’re gonna burn
Burn on through the darkest night (we’re gonna burn)
Burn until we reach the morning’s light (we’re gonna burn)
Burn till all there is is love (we’re gonna burn)
Burn with the fire from above (we’re gonna burn)
Broken to Be Blessed
Like the bread upon the altar
Like our hearts as we confess
Like the silence before the benediction
We are broken to be blessed
Like the bond of babe and mother
On the infant’s birthing breath
As we set aside our pride to let the light in
We are broken to be blessed
Chorus:
Broken to be blessed, we are broken to be blessed
Like the One who died and lives forever
We are broken to be blessed
Like a vow no longer fruitful
Like our bodies at our deaths
Like the seal on the tomb of Easter morning
We are broken to be blessed
[Chorus 2x]
Like the bread upon the altar
Like our hearts as we confess
Like the silence... before the benediction
We are broken to be blessed
In the End
Let your heart break, let the light shine through the crack
Let your soul ache for what lies beyond what you lack
For it is God’s grace that holds you as a friend
And it is God’s face that you’ll behold in the end
And in the end, there is no end
So let your heart heal, in the moment that is right
Let your soul feel through the darkness toward the light
For it is God’s grace that holds you as a friend
And it is God’s face that you’ll behold in the end
And in the end, there is no end. In the end, there is no end
Past Our Last Amen
O Father, take Your son from the many toward the One
Past our reason and our rhyme, help our hearts to heal in time
O Mother, hold Your child, our free bird flying wild
Draw him close unto your breast, help him know that he is blessed
Dear Jesus, help us face grief’s dark confusing grace
This cross that we must bear as we release him to your care
Oh Spirit, breathe Your breath through this doorway we call death
Where he stands now, brighter than day, as the shadows melt away
And you, Great Mystery, help us all to clearly see
That Your loving knows no end, even past our last amen